I've been solo traveling the world for over three years now, and I took my first trip nearly a decade ago. Needless to say, I'm a bit of an unintentional expert on the topic. Here's a list of frequently asked questions people ask about solo travel, along with my answers.
Why do you solo travel?
"And when nobody wakes you up in the morning, and when nobody waits for you at night, and when you can do whatever you want, what do you call it, freedom or loneliness?" -Charles Bukowski
The first vacation I took alone was actually in-between jobs, in-between cities. That trip was significant for me, because it was at the end of a really tumultuous year in my health, work, and family life, and I saw it as an opportunity to clean the slate before starting fresh in the new year. And in many ways, it had exactly the intended effect.
In the years that followed, solo traveling abroad became a way to come home to myself, to reconnect with myself after lengthy and stressful periods of work, or after heartbreak. I always returned from the trips feeling more connected to myself and my creativity – ready to take on another year of life's challenges.
Solo travel as a ritual for me also was perhaps the only time I truly allowed myself to take a break, prioritize my own needs, and do whatever I wanted.
Looking back, it only makes sense that the backdrop for my healing journey was traveling the world – because traveling had always been where I felt the most whole.
How many trips have you taken alone?
Most of the travel that I've done from ages 25-34 has been solo! I've probably been to over 30 countries solo. (I've lost count, but I think I'm in the mid-30s of countries I've visited.)
What's the most memorable experience you've had solo traveling?
I went to the Amazon Rainforest, and spent time living with a tribe. I will share more details about it in another post at some point, but being able to truly experience another way of life, living with the wild of nature, transformed me. It absolutely paved the way for me to backpack Africa.
What are the benefits of solo travel?
"Nothing can bring you peace but yourself." -Ralph Waldo Emerson
What time do you want to wake up? Where do you want to eat? What do you want to do? Your whole existence is determined by you. There's no negotiations, no considering of others' needs. And everyone – but especially women, who are often the primary caretakers of loved ones – needs to have the experience of being only responsible to yourself. Beyond the freedom lies peace in realizing the pleasure of your own company.
The more time that you spend building your relationship with yourself, the deeper the questions get. Who do you want to be? How do you want to show up in the world? What dreams do you have for your life? My solo travels, the time I've spent thinking without conversations with others to interrupt my thoughts, has helped me to find clarity and purpose in life.
Eventually, you realize that your life is yours, no matter what obligations you've found yourself in. At the end of the day, you are the only person who can make you happy. And you, as a radiant, fulfilled being, is the best you. It's the you that you deserve, and the you that the world deserves too.
I could go on, but to sum it up, the benefits of solo travel are the self growth that you experience along the way.
What are the disadvantages of solo travel?
🦗🦗🦗
(At first I wanted to say, "not making memories with loved ones" but that's operating from a false belief that solo travel is a zero-sum game. Take a solo trip, and take a trip with loved ones. Or take a solo trip and make memories at home with loved ones. I think truly there are no disadvantages. We spend our lives hyper-connected to others, taking a little time to connect with ourselves is like the least we can do.
And I can't think of any other possible disadvantages — if one comes to your mind, reach out, and I'll address it!)
Do you prefer solo travel over trips with friends?
For the most part, yes. I think that the best way to experience a new country and culture is alone, because your trip becomes about you and your relationship with the place, rather than about your relationship with your companion(s). Plus, you're more likely to get randomly invited places – and more likely to have the flexibility to accept them – as a solo traveler.
Perhaps you've been on a group trip where by the end of it, you realize that all you really did was go out to brunch, dinner, party and drink – the same things you do back home. This largely happens because everyone has different travel styles, and so the trip becomes more about being together, than about being in a new place.
That said, I think that if you have found a travel companion who likes to travel the way that you do, it can be fun to share the experience with that person. So really it depends.
Does solo travel get lonely?
"I used to think the worst thing in life was to end up all alone. It's not. The worst thing in life is to end up with people who make you feel all alone." -Robin Williams
I saw someone say this on Threads, and I couldn't agree more: "No, solo traveling isn’t lonely. What is lonely is waiting for someone to book that trip with you."
The thing is that I'd much rather be on the trip by myself, than at home saving the best experiences of my life for a someday that might never come. (I'd also rather be on the trip alone than with someone just for the sake of having a companion.)
I've phrased this answer as though being alone is second-best to being with a companion. It's not. But it's likely how you see it, and I go more into this idea of the trouble we have with being alone here 👇
Clara Ritger
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Finally, no, solo travel doesn't get lonely, because you're rarely ever actually alone. Every solo traveler knows that the myth of solo travel is that it's solo. If you've stayed in hostels, you know how easily it is to make new friends to go explore with. The reality is that if I truly want to be solo, I have to make a concerted effort to be. 😂
Do you ever wish that you had someone to share the experience with?
Yes. Definitely. Absolutely. I've had that thought so many times. I've been places and even thought of specific people while I was there, wishing that they were there to experience it too.
But here's my hot take, after studying meditation and mindfulness for so long: the moment is not meant to be shared. The moment is meant to be witnessed, felt, experienced. The moment you think that "the moment is meant to be shared" is the moment you are no longer having the experience, and instead, you're lost in thoughts of the past or future, missing the beauty of the present moment.
So, even though I've wished I had someone to share the experience with, I'm exploring the idea that to truly cherish an experience is to savor it, selfishly, as yours to behold and not meant for anyone else.
What do you do when loneliness or homesickness hits?
The first year that I was in college, I was extremely homesick. Most days, I called my mom, and binge-watched Gilmore Girls (on Netflix — back when Netflix was mostly mail-in DVDs). I think these two things helped, but they also isolated me from the experience I could have been having on campus.
I share this because I can't remember a time when I was homesick while traveling. I didn't start solo traveling until I was 25, after a rupture that never repaired in my family on a holiday trip. I realized that life – and U.S. vacation time – was too short to spend it traveling miserably and I never looked back.
I think that there are ways to cope with loneliness and homesickness (calling loved ones, binging comfort food/shows) and there are ways to work through it (feeling the feelings, choosing to go out anyway). But your capacity to do the latter depends on your life experiences, your present state of mental health, and how far outside your comfort zone this solo trip actually is.
Clara Ritger
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Only you know what's best for you, and sometimes that might mean going home – especially if you've bit off more than you can chew.
If you think you might feel lonely or homesick, perhaps don't read my blog and think, "Yes, I'll go backpack Africa too." Start small, and work your way up to a bigger trip. My first-ever trip was a 4-day business trip to Singapore. I liked it so much that my next trip was a 10-day vacation in Peru, half of which were spent on a group hike to Machu Picchu. I backpacked Africa for 5 months after working my way up to a 6-week trip that I took just before COVID, and realized, I didn't want it to end.
Do you ever feel anxious or nervous? How do you overcome it?
Yes. I reality check myself about my fear, listen to what it wants me to know, and then use meditation to help me return my nervous system to a regulated state so that I can make a decision about how to proceed from my intuition and not my fear.
I go into this more here 👇
Clara Ritger
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Do you have to be a very outgoing person to enjoy solo travel?
No. I'm honestly an introvert who masquerades as an extrovert. All of the friends I've made while solo traveling have approached me. (All of the friends I've made in real life have approached me too.) So, no, if you just get out there with a smile on your face and a curiosity about your environment I think you'll naturally come across people and make friends without having to really try.
How do you meet people while solo traveling?
Hostels. Free walking tours. Group trips. Sitting at the bar at restaurants. Being asked to take people's pictures. Giving directions. Riding public transportation. This is just off the top of my head.
Do you recommend booking group trips as a solo traveler?
Yes, and in particular, I think this is a great way to start solo traveling! It puts you slightly outside your comfort zone, because you're not going with anyone you know, but at the same time, the logistics and community are taken care of.
Still to this day I book group trips, but mostly because it's the most cost-effective way to see certain destinations.
How do you have enough money to solo travel? Isn't it more expensive?
Clara Ritger
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You might think "it's more expensive to solo travel" is a disadvantage I could have listed above. I'm not quite sure that statement is true. Here's my analysis by spending category:
Flights: Booking a single ticket can actually be cheaper than the price of a single ticket booked on a reservation of multiple tickets. This happens when there's a limited number of discounted fares available – they'll bump both tickets up to the higher price rather than honor the discount for one of the ticket. Also, airlines sometimes discount one-person reservations because of the seating flexibility.
Accommodation: Without a doubt, it's more expensive to travel solo if you're booking a hotel room – but you also don't have to travel that way. I've stayed in guesthouses with a room to myself in a twin bed. I've also stayed in hostels, and camped. I've arguably spent less money in the accommodation category as a solo traveler than I would have if I was traveling with a partner, because then we'd probably always go for the room, which is, ultimately, more per night per person than a hostel bed.
Transportation: Public transportation costs would be the same whether you're solo or in a group. Cab fares would be cheaper, of course. I usually only use cabs to/from the airport when I have my luggage with me, so I'm definitely spending more than I would if I had someone to split the cost. That said, you can apply the same logic for accommodation as you do to this category – I usually always take public transportation as a solo traveler, but I might be more inclined to go for the cab if I was sharing the cost. Ultimately, I'd still spend more than I would have if I was solo.
Meals: Anyone who's ever been to dinner with a group knows that the bill is always higher than if you were dining solo. Next category. 😆
Tours: I actually got half-price on my Galapagos cruise because I was a solo traveler filling an empty bed at the last-minute. The flexibility of being able to fill that one last empty space can lead to insane deals! That said, it's true that you usually can't book a tour as a solo traveler (there's a 2-person minimum) and so that limits your options a bit unless you want to spend the 2-person minimum to go.
Overall, I'd say that even if there are times where I'm spending more as a solo traveler, on the whole I reckon I am spending less money than I would if I was in a group.
Also if you want more insight into how I make the money work with travel, might I suggest upgrading your subscription? 🙃
What are the best destinations for solo travel?
There is no bad destination for solo travel, in my experience. Put another way: I have yet to have visited a place where I thought, "this would have been better with someone else." Maybe Namibia? I booked a group trip, which I had a lovely time on, but I probably would have done a self-drive tour of the country if I was with someone else.
I think as a woman, though, there are a handful of countries that I wouldn't go to alone, mostly to avoid harassment and discrimination. More on this in the next question.👇 Also, I've definitely had some challenging experiences in countries that are used to all the logistics/negotiations going through men, but as a solo woman, they had to go through me (which meant that instead of having the conversation with me, they just didn't, and expected me to go with the flow, which I did not, because they were changing the tour I booked without talking to me about it or refunding me. 😂🤦♀️)
What is the best destination for a first-time solo traveler?
Rather than name destinations, I'll share with you how I would think about choosing my first solo travel destination:
- What is the place you've always dreamed of going? Don't go there. 😂 I'm serious. Save it for your second solo trip. Let this first trip be low stakes, so you can get a feel for what it's like.
- I think language barriers add a layer of complexity to travel that you might not want to take on if it's your first solo trip.
- What is the hostel culture like where you are going, and is that something you want to be part of?
- Is there an opportunity to join a group trip for part or all of the time?
- If you're a woman, it's worth considering how the local culture might perceive you traveling alone before deciding if that's something you want to take on. Also, if you're expected to cover up, are you willing to do that?
- If you are LGBTQ+ and not cishet-passing, you might research what the local laws are and check news reports for hate crimes.
- Depending on your race, there are parts of the world that can be dangerous or harder to travel through due to prejudice. Facebook Groups and Reddit can help shed light on this.
- I would avoid places with lots of crime like pickpocketing.
- Check the U.S. State Department (or your home country's equivalent) for travel advisories.
What destination would you love to travel to, but would be nervous to go alone?
Yemen, in particular, I would love to see Socotra, an island off of the coast. You can go to Socotra on a (very expensive) group trip that flies in from the United Arab Emirates (so you don't go to the mainland). Aside from gender-based discrimination being a problem in Yemen, the country is in the midst of a humanitarian crisis and armed conflict, and the U.S. has not operated its embassy there for over a decade. So I also don't feel that it's responsible to visit Socotra right now, even if you can.
Is it safe to travel alone as a woman?
In many parts of the world, yes. It is no less safe than existing in your home country. I would say that as a (white) woman, I've mostly felt safe while traveling, and it's been sociocultural misogyny and patriarchy that has been more of a frustration than anything.
Note: I can only speak from my perspective as a white woman; women of color often face different, and sometimes greater, safety concerns.
Clara Ritger
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How do you deal with people asking whether you have a boyfriend or husband, not to mention marriage proposals?
If you read the blog post above, I admit that sometimes I lie and say that I do have one. I hate this, but sometimes it feels like the only option to be left alone.
That said, I think that part of traveling is cultural exchange and education – but you have to remember that you're a guest in their country, not the other way around. So on a case-by-case basis, depending on how safe I feel with the interrogator, and how open they seem to me as human soul versus me as a human with a vagina, I will stand my ground and admit that I am an independent woman traveling the world. Then I ask questions back to them, like "why did you ask me if I have a boyfriend or a husband?" and "what do you think about a woman doing things alone?" to see if they can start to dismantle the thinking that led them to see me being alone as a woman in her 30's without kids as a "problem" that needed a (male) "solution." I've had a handful of these conversations over the years, and to be honest, I doubt I've made much "change" with them. If I had to guess, I think they generally chalk it up to me being a cheeky American woman, but, I suppose I still try anyway, in the hope that it opens them to the humanity (dreams, autonomy) of their mothers, sisters, wives, and daughters at home.
What safety precautions do you take when traveling solo?
I don't drink alcohol, do drugs, or go out at night (alone). I don't walk down alleyways that are dark or sketchy looking (subjective) alone. I don't go to rough neighborhoods alone. I learn some basic phrases in the local language to create a friendly connection with strangers. I make sure my phone can work in an emergency. I have Find My Friends enabled with a few friends. I keep my passport locked in my suitcase, along with some extra USD cash. If I've taken out a lot of local currency from the ATM, I keep most of it locked up too, and only carry what I need for a few days with me in my wallet. I wear a fanny pack so that my phone and wallet are in front of me at all times. I travel with prescriptions for food poisoning, I don't have drinks with ice, I don't eat raw fruit and vegetables unless I have peeled them myself, I use a SteriPen to purify all my drinking water, and I even brush my teeth with the purified water. I keep a sheet with my parents' emergency contact information in three places: my wallet, my suitcase, and with my electronics, so that if I am ever found unconscious, they can be reached. I realize some of these are not the safety precautions you were probably thinking of, but there's a lot that goes into safety!
Has anything ever happened that made you doubt or regret your choice to travel solo?
Clara Ritger
Yes. Yes it has. 😂
I wouldn't say that anything bad I've experienced has made me regret my choice to travel solo though.
How do you navigate a city/country where you don't speak the language?
I learn basic phrases to be able to ask for directions in the local language, I have Google Translate in the local language downloaded to my phone, and I get a local SIM or have my phone connected internationally so that I can navigate on my own.
How do you take good photos of yourself?
I don't. I take a lot of selfies, and occasionally if I really want a nice photo in front of a landmark, I ask someone who looks friendly.
How do you eat alone without feeling awkward?
"The greatest thing in the world is to know how to belong to oneself." -Michel de Montaigne
I used to travel for work a lot. I think I sort of got over the hump of eating alone very early. But my advice would be to sit at the bar, even if you're not drinking, because it's very normal to eat alone there, and the bartender or even people next to you will talk to you. You can also bring a book, or a journal, and sit at a table, which is often what I do because I'm lost in conversation with myself! 😂
How do you deal with getting invited to go places with people you meet while traveling alone? What if you want to go, but you'd rather go solo?
You can just say no. It's really not that big of a deal. I've also said yes, but drawn boundaries around it from the get-go. "I'd love to do this thing with you, but then I'm going to go off on my own after, just because I'm looking for some alone time on this trip."
What do you think someone needs to know before taking their first solo trip?
See (the same post I linked in an earlier question): The Number One Travel Tip Every Adventurer Needs to Hear
I like the idea of a solo trip, but I'm daunted by it too. How can I take the first step?
What is holding you back? I think understanding your fears and hesitation is really important to being able to work through it. Rather than plow through your fear, maybe there's something you could do to meet what your fear is trying to tell you.
Then once you do that, start to research where you want to go. Or, start to research where you want to go while you work through your fear. Maybe understanding that the place you're going isn't so scary after all will help!
What is one thing that solo travel taught you about life that you couldn't have learned any other way?
Clara Ritger
This ☝️
Clara Ritger
And this ☝️
There's a sentiment that I write in my book, that goes something like this:
I've traveled the world looking for the greenest grass, and you know what I've found?
The grass is greenest where you water it.
I don't think that I could have ever figured that out without not only changing my perspective, but experiencing the perspective of so many cultures around the world and their desire to go somewhere "better."
How has solo travel changed your life?
"Alone time is when I distance myself from the voices of the world so I can hear my own." -Oprah
I lost myself chasing a life I thought I wanted. I found myself leaving it all behind. Solo traveling the world healed me. It also taught me that home is my body. And for the first time in my life, it's a nice place to be.
Any other advice that you have for solo travelers?
A few times in my life, I have had this realization: "I'm not okay with dying without doing _____."
If you feel the call to take a solo trip, don't let it be the regret you have on your deathbed.
And if you're already a solo traveler looking for advice?
What you seek is already within you.
Any other questions that you have for me? Leave a comment and I'll reply and/or update the post!
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